Things I want

A list, in no particular order, of things that I really, really, really want.

We'll start with the most urgent one.  I want to sleep in until 7am.  That's all.  That's not asking too much, right?  It's not like I'm saying I want to get to spend a lazy day in bed where I only get up to get coffee or go pee.  Just, to sleep, glorious, glorious sleep, until 7am.  This whole 5am nonsense?  Yeah, the kid needs to knock that off immediately.  Especially on days when Joe has to go in to work early and can't take him downstairs for an hour while I try to close my eyes again.

I would also like a magic wand that I can wave over the floor and make all the ants disappear.  "Now, Susie," I can hear you saying, "they do make things that do that.  Brooms and vacuums and such."  The thing is, I sweep the kitchen floor every morning.  I have to.  Because otherwise I'd step on thousands on dead, dying, or somewhere in between ants just to get to the coffee machine.  And dammit, I need coffee. I'm not including that on the list because that's a need, not a want, and it's a need that I actually do get, so yay!  But the ants have got to go.  Have you ever lived anywhere that's infested with anything?  It's the worst.  We have spray and gel and pellets and even special chalk that we're using to try to get these damn things under control, but there's only so much you can do, especially with cats who like to do things like lick walls and eat bits of...  stuff....  off the floor.  We've asked our landlord about getting someone professional in here to take care of it, but being typical Sam, has asked that we give the ortho home defense stuff another week or so to see if it works first.  Whatever.  We need Dale's Dead Bug!

A day with a high of 75.  I'm sure a lot of people can sympathize on this one.  And I'm sure a lot of people are like "what the heck?  At least it's only 85 where you are!" To them, I say, Yes.  It is only 85.  It was 85 today, it was 85 yesterday, and it will be 85 tomorrow.  And it's also humid.  And sticky.  And OMG for once I want to feel cool air in my lungs that hasn't had all the moisture stripped out from the air conditioner that we can't even run because $300 electric bills are so not ok.  I got so spoiled in Pacific Grove with it's nice cool weather.  Lots of people complained about that, but I loved it.  And anytime I wanted it to be hot?  Easy peasy!  All I had to do was drive 20 mins north or east to get completely different weather.  It was awesome. I miss it.

You know how sometimes it's so great to be able to get into your car and drive somewhere different?  We don't get to do that.  Stupid island.  I mean sure, we can drive to the other side of the island, but that's not the same thing.  I want to actually go somewhere, not just drive in circles.

And last, but certainly not least, I want a really awesome supportive husband.  The kind of guy who tells me how much he loves me all throughout the day.  The one who texts "It's so hard to leave in the morning when Maxwell's being all cute and smiley!" and who can tell by the look on my face when he walks through that door that tonight, we are having frozen pizza for dinner and that's totally ok, and not only that, but once I finish feeding the baby he offers to go get me a nice cold beer.  Of course, I totally have this one, so yay!  End on a positive note!  Although I really wish my awesome husband and I could sleep in until 7, then get up and make coffee in our clean kitchen, to spend a lovely day driving with the cool breeze blowing to somewhere different.

Easy baby vs. crying baby

I do not have an easy baby. I was soo hoping I would, and at times, he's great.  Like whenever there's someone here to help.  The week Mom and Dad were here? Perfect happy angel! Ok, true, the first day my grandmother was here he definitely wasn't on his best behavior, but generally, he's good.  When it's just us? I should post a picture of all the scratches he's given me while completely hysterical. He now spends more than half his waking hours crying (and the other half on the verge of tears), and only naps in the morning.  I find myself looking at him, more than a little scared, like a ticking time bomb, ready to go off at any moment. We take turns walking around with him, patting his back, whispering soothing words in his ear, while the other person tries to eat or sit down or go to the bathroom.  When he's crying because he's hungry or has a dirty diaper or even just because he's not in the exact position he wants to be, it's ok.  We know there's a reason, and even if the solution is something we can't do (like hold him over our shoulder with one arm and pat his back with our other, while pacing the living room, for hours), we understand.  But when we have no idea? Or he's just tired? God, that is so frustrating!! All we want is for him to be happy, and when we can't make him happy (or at least quiet, let's be honest, when we're ready for bed we start feeling a little selfish and we just want him to Be Quiet!), it's heartbreaking!

But before you get all worried about me feeling overwhelmed or something, let me assuage your concerns! Because all that, all the crying and frustrations and lack of sleep, it's all ok.  He makes it ok everytime he looks up at me and his whole body lights up in a huge smile.  I say body, because seriously, he manages to smile with his toes. He can't talk yet, he can't even really laugh, but when he smiles like that he's so clearly saying "Mom! You are the most amazing person ever and you make me so happy! I love you!" And thats just about the best feeling ever.  Even when he's crying he's telling me how much he loves me.  Well, sometimes anyway.  Not so much when he's flipping out and is ll tense and scratching me, but when he's on my shoulder and is gripping my arm like it's the only thing he needs, I like that. It feels like even though he's upset, he's relying on me and trusts that I'll make it better.  Or right now! You'll have to forgive the typos, because I'm typing this one handed. In the other hand, all curled up and sweet, is a napping baby.  The hard moments make the good ones all the more sweeter and appreciated.

Like I said, he is not an easy baby, and I really hope my next one is easier (all this practice soothing a crying baby has to be good for something, right?), but I wouldn't change him for anything!  Even if I am awfully hungry right now, but there's no way i'm gonna disturb him to get some food...

To be fair, ceiling fans are pretty cool

Today is an exciting day!  We're going to try to give Maxwell a bottle for the first time.  I don't know why he wouldn't take it, and once he does that means I can start having Joe feed him sometimes, which will be awesome!  I figure I should probably still wake up in the middle of the night and pump when Joe feeds him then, because otherwise I might explode in a milky mess, but that only takes like 15 mins, as opposed to the hour or so that it takes to feed him (the actual feeding part only takes 15 mins, but first I have to wake him up, change his diaper, convince him to please, for the love of God, OPEN YOUR MOUTH BABY!!!!, and then work up enough energy to carry him back to our room to go bed (which usually takes at least 10 mins, although at least by then he's pretty well passed out)).  So we'll see how it goes.

We bought a swing yesterday.  I think he likes it?  He's still too young to smile, so it can be hard to tell when he's happy.  He was calm though, which I guess works.  He still didn't really look at the mobile, which surprised us.  His most favorite thing ever is the ceiling fan.  It doesn't even have to be on.  When he gets fussy we can usually just lay him on his back underneath it and once he catches sight of it he'll just stop, totally transfixed, and stare at it like it's the most amazing thing he's ever seen. I can't wait until he's old enough to start actually playing though.  I want to see him smile and hear him laugh and all that fun stuff!

Muna left a couple days ago.  She was only here for a few days, but it was really nice.  I honestly didn't think having another person here would make that much of a difference, since I'm the only one who can feed him (although that might change after today!), and he eats every hour-2 hours during the day, but it was actually pretty great.  He was the most cranky, crying, screamy baby we'd seen yet the first day she was here though.  I kinda felt bad...  I swear, he's not normally that bad!  Normally he's totally happy during the day, and then gets cranky in the evening, which just requires that we give him a lot more attention (which does make cooking and eating a little tricky), and then has a little freak out right before bed, but that first day she was here, he would not stop crying.  Ugh.  We did almost manage to successfully go out to eat though!  It probably would've been completely successful if the place we went to wasn't sooooo slow.  After waiting 15 mins for our drinks, I told them to go ahead and bring our food out to go, which was a good idea.  He was pretty starving by the time it came.  The food was good though.

I think I say "though" and "which" too much on here.  Maybe I'll work on that....  It's probably more fun to read a blog that's written better.  I mean, I know I'm just to incredibly fascinating that you'll want to read about my life regardless of how poorly written it is, but just think of how much better it'd be if it was actually well written!  That'd be even more amazing than a ceiling fan!

He's a month old today!

How has it already been a month? Didn't I just get home from the hospital yesterday? Every day he changes too.  One day he was all floppy bobble head, now he can hold it up very well.  He's focusing on our eyes now, instead of just some random area in front of him.  He's starting to turn his head to follow ours and is eating and napping more regularly.  All normal baby things, but it's pretty fun to watch how quickly he's growing up. We're still waiting for the first real smile. Babies are so much more fun when they interact with you!

Anyway, I wanted to assure everyone that we're doing great here!  Obviously it's an adjustment, but we're happy.  I'm getting a lot more sleep than most new moms get, which is awesome, although I didn't get much last night.  But then Joe took him downstairs at 6 and let me sleep until 7:30, which was sooo nice. So I feel relatively human. :)

I swear I had lots of things I wanted to talk about on here...  I kinda can't think of anything though.  Hmm.  My neighbor dropped off a bag of mangos from his mom's yard, so I think I'll just go eat one of those.  Maybe the sugar will spark a creative writing streak!

All about baby

Yesterday we had to Maxwell to his two week appointment, and the nurse practitioner mentioned how every visit they'll give us a paper with all his "stats" (length, weight, etc) and how it's great for the baby book.  Then she laughed and commented on how the book for the first baby is always the best, but then the later kids don't ever get one that's filed out.  I told her that we hadn't even written his name in his book yet, but she kept going on about the first baby book is the best.  I think she wasn't really listening too well.  That's ok though, it's not like we need a medical professional to actually listen to us!  She wasn't even the pediatrician, who we never actually met, even after being told "the Doctor will be in in just a couple minutes" and then waiting over half an hour, which wouldn't have been a super huge deal, except that Maxwell was hungry, so he was crying and we were waiting to feed him because the Doc was supposed to be right in.  My point being, we were already a little annoyed at the NP when she started talking about the baby book.  I will try to fill the thing out though!  And while I'm at it, maybe we should print some pictures of him, so we have actual hard copies!  Or, hey, print pictures from our wedding, because we still don't have any.  I mean, we have hem on the flash drive, but we never got our book, and haven't printed any out yet, and since we've been married over a year, that really seems like the kind of thing we should have done by now....

Anyway.  Maxwell's two weeks old!  Actually, two weeks and one day, but whatever, two weeks is close enough.  I'm really looking forward to him being old enough to take bottles, because then I can make Joe get up and feed him occasionally, and I can get some sleep.  I miss sleep...  And for some weird reason I thought that after I gave birth I'd only being one person again, but that was awfully naive.  He's still pretty attached to me.  I feel bad, because he's definitely calmer with me than with Joe, and as Joe points out, most of the time when he's crying there's literally nothing he can do to help, that's all me.  I think he feels a little left out.  But I've started pumping, so soon enough Joe will get to help with feeding, and that should help everything, right?  Joe is way better than me at playing with him though. I'm pretty positive that he's going to smile for him first. All he does with me is sleep and eat, Joe's already the "fun" parent, which is ok. It's very cute to watch.

We are doing pretty well though.  The past two mornings he's thrown up pretty violently, but I think that's kinda normal. He just eats too much in the morning. But again, pumping should help with that, cuz then I wont be as full.  Of course, I could be totally wrong about that, cuz I am totally making this all up as I go along, but isn't that what every parent does?

Speaking of which, when do I start feeling like an actual parent?  Right now it feels more like I have an exceptionally needy pet, not like I'm a mother and he's my son.  I guess it just hasn't hit me yet?

We haven't really sarted using the cloth diapers yet.  We're planning on it, but right now he's just going through too many, and they look so huge on him!   Disposable's are easy, but they do get expensive awfully quickly.  Maybe for now we'll just use the cloth ones at night, when I'm not changing them as often?

Some local friends came over to meet him yesterday.  He was being a perfect angel while they were here, then started screaming about an hour after they left, and didn't stop until we got him to sleep at 8.  9? uh...  Sometime around them, I don't remember. I passed out shortly after him.

Good times!

All the gory details (feel free to skip over this if you don't like gory details)

So after 40 weeks and 3 days, I finally had a baby!  Just about the only thing that I knew about childbirth was that you can't really predict how it's going to go down, so trying to plan for it seemed awfully silly to me.  Unfortunately,  you kinda can't help but make some assumptions, and just about every one I made ended up being wrong.  Like I sorta assumed I would labor quickly, after all, everyone else in my family did, how unfair would it be if I was the only one who didn't?  And I assumed it would all go smoothly without any major complications, because we all always assume that.  I do anyway.  It's too scary and stressful to assume otherwise.  I assumed that I would do the whole skin-to-skin thing right after giving birth, because I'd read about how great it is for you and the baby (especially the baby), and it's something my hospital really pushes.  I assumed I'd donate the cord blood, because I'm a nice person like that.  Even filled out the 15 page form and everything!

Yeah, none of that happened.

I already talked about how I was a little overdue going into labor anyway, but I didn't go too far, and I didn't need an induction, so that was good.  It all started at about 9pm on Sunday.  My head had literally just hit the pillow when I started getting...  wet.  Gross.  So I grab a towel, get Joe, and off we go!  When we got to the hospital they laughed when I said that my water had broke, and all gave each other knowing looks and told me "yeah....  you're the fourth tonight!" I thought that meant that they were super busy, but then when the Doc checked me he was like "Oh!  This is a real one!" so I guess they'd been having false alarms all night.  By this point my contractions had started.  They were very uncomfortable, but not super bad.  Until they told me that I was still only a centimeter dilated.  I was admitted, whisked into the l&d room, and decided to go ahead with the epidural because they were getting to the point where they were right on top of each other, and I was sooo not looking forward to several more hours of that.

So things keep going.  Joe and I tried to doze off when we could. Talked when we felt more awake. Nurses and Doc's came and went.  By 5:30 I was finally 9 cm!  Woo!  The epidrual was starting to wear off, and they offered to give me some more, and I say yes, so they call for the anesthesiologist.  But one of the Doc's thought something looked a little weird.  And then suddenly, Doctors!  Nurses!  Techs! Everyone!  Rushes into my room and checks machines and stares at me (well, a part of me) very intently and argues and orders drugs and suddenly I'm getting a shot in the arm because my contractions are happening so quickly that baby's heart rate wasn't able to recover, and was getting very low, so they needed to stop the labor from progressing so he could rest.  Not that they told me any of this at the time, mind you.  I'm just laying there wondering what the hell is going on and getting more and more scared as the minutes go by.  It wasn't until everyone but my regular nurse had left that she was able to talk to me.  And of course, explain that I can't get more pain meds because of the other shot they'd given me.

Awesome.

It starts to get a little fuzzy after that. Much pain.  Followed by more.  Followed by feeling like someone had shot an arrow through my hip and back and it got stuck there.  Followed by the most unfair thing ever- throwing up while having a contraction.  That was when I started crying.  I hate throwing up under the best of circumstances, but while my insides are twisting and there's a giant stick jammed in my back? Nope, not doing that.  I swear to God, if I could've talked I would've said something to the effect of "I give up, I'm not doing this anymore," despite how impossible that is.  It's probably a good thing that I wasn't able to say that, because I'm pretty sure I would've decked the nurse (or Joe) for telling me that giving up wasn't really an option at that point.

Finally by 11 I was able to start pushing!  Woo!  By this point I'd been at the hospital for 13 hours, and had been at 9 cm for 6.  So I start to push.  And I keep pushing.  And they keep saying positive, helpful things to me while I was pushing, and then telling me how he wasn't moving when the contractions subsided.  After....  uh...  an hour?  An hour and a half?  A midwife comes in to check on me and despite the fact that 3 other doctors and a few nurses had checked and said all was fine, she notices that the baby's facing the wrong way- sideways, instead of facing my spine.  So she turns him and finally at 1:...  13?  16?  I feel like I should know that.  1:16 I think, he was born.  Yay!

Yeah, I so didn't care.  All the pain meds had worn off, I was beyond exhausted, there was something said about meconium and the cord and there were pediatricians there and all I wanted was the anesthesiologist to come back and give me meds.  At one point I think they did actually offer to let me hold him and I, very polity I'm sure, declined.  After I got my meds though, I looked over and saw the look on Joe's face while he was watching them cleaning him up and felt a lot better.  It wasn't until later that I learned that the cord was wrapped around his neck during the delivery.  Some things might be better left unsaid, especially to an already freaking out and exhausted woman who only cares about getting through this horrible ordeal.

He's fine now though.  :)  And I'm feeling much better.  Well, sorta.  He didn't sleep at all last night, which meant that I didn't sleep at all last night (Joe was able to get a little bit of rest downstairs while I was up with baby because we need one of us to be able to drive to the Doc's appt today), so I made myself some coffee.  And NOW he sleeps.  All peaceful and quiet.  And even though I'm still exhausted, I can't sleep with fresh caffeine in my system.

And that's why I wrote this big long blog.

You're welcome.

I can't believe I'm still pregnant!

Ok, first of all, FU to blogger to making it so freaking hard for me to get to this page, just because I made a new email account with my "new" last name. The one I've had for over a year.  For some stupid reason, I can't figure out how to add myself (as the new address) as a contributer to the blog.  And as I was writing that, it just signed me out of my "new" email address (that I've been using for several months, text me or something if you want it but don't have it) and automatically signed me into my old one.  *bangs head into wall*  I might just give up on this blog and start a whole new one.

Also- mac people- is there any way to right click with the mouse pad on the computer?  I got the actual mouse set up to right click, but then it died, so I only have the touch pad mouse thingie, and being able to right click is very helpful when writing cuz then I can fix spelling errors easily.  So, you know, sorry for all the errors in this one, I may go back and fix them, but I may not.  I'm sure you wont think of less me.

Today is April 18, 2013.  It is supposed to mark the end of my pregnancy.  It's only 10:30, so it still could.  There's still plenty of time for today to be my son's birthday.  The thing is though, it somehow never really occurred to me that I'd still be pregnant today.  I mean sure, I said that I knew I could be late going into labor.  Rationally, I knew that the whole "due date" thing is just the middle of the time when babies normally come, so it's not like it's some hard and fast rule.  I knew that lots of people go into labor a few days, or even weeks after this day.  And yet, in the back of my mind, I always knew that none of those silly little "facts" were relevant and that I'd give birth early!  That by today not only would I already have a baby, I'd probably already be home.  It still scares me too that everytime I look in the mirror, I swear my stomach is bigger.  He can't seriously still be gaining weight, can he?  At my last 5 or so doctor's appointments either the doctor or the nurse has commented on how I'm "all belly," and really, I feel like I am.  Not just how they meant it (one went on to clarify that my pregnant body looks pretty much like a normal, not pregnant body, except for the belly and the baby and not much else is different), but like I'm seriously all belly.  There's nothing else.  Just this giant stomach with this squirming and kicking and hiccuping person inside of it.

So I've been walking a lot.  Even when I'm not walking around the block, or to go "check the mail" for the 5th time, despite the fact that I got the mail the first time, I'm pacing.  I'm wandering around the house.  I'm investigating every leaf on my cilantro and basil plants (and cursing the existance of white flies, which technically, btw, aren't even flies, and are immune to even the strongest pesticides, and really like to kill all my plants because they're evil bastards and I hate them) and talking to the lizards that live around our house.  I'm drinking a ton of water, because that's what you're supposed to do, and the bathrooms are upstairs, so that makes me have to walk up and down the stairs a few dozen times a day, and I figure, that's good for me, right?  Loosen up my pelvis or something?  Everyone says that he'll come when he's ready, but that seems silly to me.  It's not him who we're waiting for, it's my uterus!  So it's my fault that I'm still pregnant!  Ugh.

I also feel like I've become really, really boring.  For the last several months my life has been all about waiting for this new life to be born, and not much else.  It's been over a year since I've had a job.  I don't see myself getting one anytime soon either.  I'd like to go back to work, I feel like I'll go crazy if I don't, but we'll see.  Right now, living here, it's not really an option.  I'm kinda hoping that once I have a baby, I wont want to work so badly.  I do have a friend here with a toddler (15 months, that counts as a toddler, right?), but lately it's kinda too hard to hang out with her, since it's so hard for me to move, or be more than 10 feet away from the bathroom at any given time.  And I can't really go anywhere, because I need to be ready to go to the hospital on a moments notice.  Well, probably not a moment's notice, I'll probably have several hours of notice, but I'd rather spend those hours at home with my husband and my cats and my comfy couch and bed.

I can say with a fair amount of certainty that though, that the next time I update this (or give up and make a new blog), I'll be a mother.  Which is such a scary thought....  Maybe it's ok that he's taking his time...

I'm not fat, I'm pregnant!

Oh yeah, the other thing I was going to post!  I weighed myself this morning and yay!  I weigh more than I ever have before!  :-/  It's a weird feeling.  Hard not to go running straight for the stationary bike and peddle like my life depends on it.  Especially because I know I still need to gain another 15-20 pounds.  As long as it's mostly just my stomach (well, uterus, but yeah) and hips, that's ok, but I don't want to get flabby arms and legs!  I just keep reminding myself that it's all for baby, and that as long as I stay active and eat well, I shouldn't have too much trouble losing the extra pounds.  Maybe I should stop making so many cookies though...  And I might not have needed all that 75% off Christmas candy, but it was so cheap!  Milky Way snowmen!  Lindt chocolate bears!  M&M's that are just regular M&Ms except with festive packaging!  All so cheap!  And yummy!  And I had to eat that leftover pie before it went bad!  I'm only about 6-7 pounds more than I was when I got pregnant, but  I did lose several pounds during those first few months, so really I've gained over 10 pounds in the past month, which is more than I should have.  Maybe it's time to go walk to the mailbox....  and maybe I should get there by going down the beach and all the way around the neighborhood....

New Years festivities, vacations, vacuums, and probably not poisonous mushrooms

I keep trying to post on facebook, but then realize that I have a whole paragraph, so I figured maybe facebook isn't actually the best spot for my thoughts, because apparently, I have many, many thoughts.  What can I say?  I'm a thoughtful person (that's totally what thoughtful means, right?).

So, thought number one- Holy crap people here get really excited about New Years!!  I have never heard such a loud, sustained celebration as I did last night.  People were literally running up and down the streets screaming at the top of their lungs.  Kids were setting off poppers and those little fireworks that you just put on the ground (you know what I'm talking about, right?  The kind that you just light and then a bunch of lights shoots up a few feet?  Not like real fireworks... hm.) from about 9am until 1am, and no, that's not a typo.  They didn't wait for it to get dark to start lighting stuff on fire.  We could hear all the really big explosions from the resorts all night, several of which actually shook our house.  Luckily, the cats handled it a lot better than I thought they would.  They didnt really like all the loud noises, but they were so happy that my parents were gone that they didn't mind too much.

And that brings me to thought number two!  All last week my parents were here.  It was pretty great, cuz it was a nice vacation for us as well as for them.  We got to do all kinds of fun stuff, like checking out the huge waves in the North Shore and watching the surfers and boogie boarders (the boogie boarders looked like they were having waaaaayyyy more fun), snorkeling out in K-Bay, whale watching at Kaena Point, we even managed to sneak a luau in there.  I don't think we did a very good job of showing why we don't like it here, but that's ok.  That wasn't really the point, after all.

We just ordered a new vacuum!  We only had the little electric one, and that wasn't really doing it's job. We needed a sucky vacuum! We'd been looking at them for awhile, but didn't really want to spend all the money on a nice one yet (seriously, nice vacuums are way more expensive than I'd realized.  actually, pretty much everything in life is more expensive than I'd thought...), but then we saw the Dyson Animal on Bestbuy for $270 off.  I hate to plug a big retailer like that, especially one as annoying as Best Buy, but they had the same one for sale at the Nex and it was still $100 more.  That's some pretty exciting savings!  And even without having to pay all the insane hospital and doctor fees, having a baby is expensive!  Right now we have the stroller, the adapter for the car seat to fit in the stroller (although we dont have the car seat yet, we can only get a few certain kinds, and they were out), a breast pump, a changing table, a rocking sleeper thingie, and a handful of clothes.  We dont have any onesies, or diapers, or a crib, or a dresser, or bedding, or....  I dunno, what else do we need?  Gates...  I know we need gates to block off the areas we don't want the kid going.  Like the wine racks.  Also, I need a new computer (not everything is about the baby).  It's a good thing that my wonderful husband is about to get a raise!  Is it too early for me to be thinking about going back to work?  We were talking about setting up something for a college fund, and then of course started talking about things like retirement, and we're gonna need a down payment for a house and the car needs some body work and eek!

Next week is my last week of my second trimester.  We're about to be completely responsible for a tiny human's life.  Scary.

In a couple weeks we have our site leader training class for a whale watching thing we're doing.  We wont be going out onto a boat, just watching from shore, but we'll have about 20 people or so that we'll be leading to help us write down when we see the whales, what they're doing, how many they are, etc.  Should be fun.  Then after that I want to do a turtle thing, where to write down all of the above, and also just hang out at the beach answering questions and talking to tourists.  With the sudden life change that's about to happen, I'm not sure how much time I'll have to do that, but they said they only ask that you volunteer once or twice a month, which should be doable.  And after you prove that you actually are going to show up, they give you a bunch of books on sea turtles, which sounds pretty dang good to me!  I'll just need to figure out what to do with the baby while I'm out there....  Hmm.

We have a crazy mushroom growing in the backyard, and I'm pretty sure it's one of the really yummy good to eat kinds (based on my mushroom ID book, and the internet), but I'm still not going to actually try it.  I should take some pics though... It's pretty cool looking.